There are a lot of people around my age who suffer from anxiety. I am one of them. So I wanted to write about it to help those with it to get through it and for those who don't, to help them understand what it is like and what they should do or be wary about when someone has anxiety or a panic attack.
What Is Anxiety?
For me, anxiety is fearing I have done or said something wrong. That others will disapprove. Being afraid of rejection or not fitting in. Scared of speaking alone in front of others. Being shy around new people. What I'm describing is called social anxiety, which is what I have. I guess you could say there are different types of anxiety, because not everyone would have it at the same level. Some people have social anxiety, some have anxiety from phobias, some have anxiety with panic attacks some have it without, and there is also generalized anxiety which involves excessive and unrealistic worry and tension even if there is little or nothing to provoke the anxiety. I've never come across anyone with generalized anxiety so I assume it is quite rare. Most people have social anxiety (generally those around my age) and I think school is a massive cause of this. When I was younger, in primary school (or elementary school for you Americans), I never used to have anxiety or get anxious or have panic attacks. But ever since I moved up to secondary school it has been a big problem for me. This is most likely due to the amount of pressure that we face as students and also the urge to impress one another. For example, in my school we have a totally stupid 'social hierarchy' where there are the 'popular' people at the top and then more or less the rest of the year towards the bottom. In my opinion this thing is insane and unacceptable because it brings SO much pressure on us to look our best the whole time we are at school.it's like the rule is 'if you're not in with the latest fashion or hair trend then you will be ignored' so if you don't wear cool clothes or have cool things then you might as well not be liked by anyone. Of course this isn't true. Everyone should have their own opinion and their own style and their own interests. Why should we have to follow a crowd all the time? I'm being a right hypocrite right now because I am one of those girls who will want the latest stuff and fashionable clothes! But it's all because of my anxiety and the fear of not fitting in and being liked by others. Okay, I've gone off topic a little bit having a rant about school and expectations so I think i should get back on track!
So basically that's what living with social anxiety is like; the fear of not being accepted and not living up to expectations. I think it's a good idea to talk about some of the symptoms of anxiety because you may have but just not know it. Of course, social anxiety is a disorder and it can be helped or treated so if you have any of the following symptoms you can always check with your doctor and they can tell you anything you need to know, but remember that is a choice that only you can make and you don't have to do that.
Please note that some of these are also just everyday worries that could be due to stress or other factors.
- Difficulty concentrating
- Feeling 'on edge' or worried/anxious
- Tiredness
- Dizziness
- Aching muscles
- Dry mouth
- Trembling or shaking
- Sweating
- Shortness of breath
- Headache
- Feeling sick
- Feeling extremely emotional
- Hot or cold flushes
- Senses are heightened
These can also be signs of a panic attack. In many cases, panic attacks strike out of the blue, without any warning. Often, there is no clear reason for the attack. They may even occur when you’re relaxed or asleep. But this isn't the case all the time. They may occur because of a phobia, e.g claustrophobia and being in a small space, or because you are worried of disapproval, like just before an exam of speaking in front of people, or because you have a lot on your mind and anxious about it. For those of you who don't know or who have never experienced a panic attack I will explain it for you. A panic attack is a sudden surge of overwhelming anxiety and fear. Your heart pounds and you can’t breathe. You may even feel like you’re dying or going crazy. So that last point was a bit dramatic, I know! But sometimes it's what people feel. I have had a few panic attacks but I've never felt like i was dying or going crazy, that's just what I picked up from other people, as I said not everyone has the same level of anxiety.
My Experience
The first time I had a panic attack was about two years ago. I was on holiday with my family in France and I was in bed. I don't really remember falling sleep but all of a sudden I wake up and I have no idea where I am. A wave of panic came over me and I was sweating and shaking and I started crying uncontrollably. I didn't know what to do. I knew I was panicking because I kept taking in quick, short breaths but I didn't know why. I felt really sick and the room seemed like it was spinning so I sat up on the end of my bed. It didn't last very long probably only about five minutes but I still felt scared, confused, worried and dizzy afterwards. I tried to stand up but fell into the wall, I managed to open the window and breath in some fresh air to calm me down. I stood there for about ten minutes just listening to crickets and calming myself down. I went to get a drink of water and felt calm again.
It took me a while to get back to sleep because I was so dazed about what just happened! In the morning I woke up feeling fine and just carried on with the day like it was nothing to worry about. Of course later on (like when I got back home to England) I found out it was a panic attack.
At that time it didn't really feel like I had anxiety but that soon grew. So a word of warning, just because it doesn't feel like you have anxiety now, if you start getting any of the symptoms it could develop so you just need to be wary of your feelings.
What Should I Do If I Have A Panic Attack?
When I'm having a panic attack, I try to calm myself down, which is an obvious thing to do but when it's actually happen you don't think about it because so much is going on. I normally go outside and have a walk around, or if I'm already outside (I would probably be in a public place) then I will find somewhere quiet and out of the way and sit down and try to relax. I do this by trying to just slow down and take deep breaths to control my breathing. Drinking water also helps A LOT because as your body goes into panic mode it uses up a lot of energy especially if you're breathing fast.
If I'm with someone I'd prefer them to be quiet unless I ask them something. It doesn't help if someone is talking to me, or trying to distract me. It's nice to know someone is with you, but If I'm having a panic attack, I'm already hearing everything 10x louder and need to try and calm down. You also don't have a lot of energy to speak, as any energy you do have, is being used everywhere else.
What Should I Consider If Someone Has Anxiety?
Now you may not be a sufferer of anxiety yourself, but you may know someone who is. You should just keep on mind that they may not want to go on a night out and would rather stay in because it's more comfortable for them especially being in their own home around their own things. If they do have a panic attack please DO NOT panic yourself, it will only make things worse for them and you. Stay calm and just let them know you're there if they need anything and ask them if they want some water or anything else you have to drink because it can calm them down. Hugging them probably isn't a good idea because you can feel quite claustrophobic during a panic attack and it wouldn't help if they're having hot flushes. Ask them if they want to go outside for some air or to a more quiet place. Just remember the main thing to do is to stay calm.
That's all I have to talk about really but don't hesitate to ask me any questions at all even if it doesn't relate to this! Make sure to follow me on bloglovin to stay updated :)
All my love
Anna
